Friday, January 10, 2014

Spotted! Hollywood Celeb Sightings from Feddd and Sara Circs

A crowd gathers waiting for Craig T. Nels.  

Hey everybodys, it’s award season in Hollywood, so you know what that means! … Not much. Not much at all. Pretty much no different from any other season. OMG YES IT IS. It means it’s time to call up our old pals, TVMWW’s Hollywood Correspondents, Feddd and Sara Circs!

These two mofos live in LA, eat papayas on the reg and are TAPPED INTO the Hollywood scene. So seeing as the Golden Glorbs air this Sunday night, I decided to call an emergency TVMWW staff meeting (held over Gchat) to see what the hell’s been goin’ on in The City by the Bay.




Number 1 on the meeting’s agenda: “WHAT FAMOUS PEOPLE HAVE YOU SEEN RECENTLY?” because that is honestly all that these two are good for. There was no #2 on the agenda. There was however a #3: “What’s everybody wearing?” and three #4’s: “Should we have a #2?”, “Does anyone know how to use Gchat?” and “What do you guys think of this agenda?”

Onto the chat!

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Sara: Can i tell you guys about the time i saw Kyle Gass even though it was like 8 years ago

Feddd: ‪Yeah, tell us, Circs

me: ‪Sure. Who the hell is Kyle Glass?

Feddd:‪ YOU DON'T KNOW ANYONE

Sara: ‪The guy in Tenacious D who isn't Jack Black

me: ‪OMG aka the most boring person ever.

Sara: ‪And it's Kyle Gass. Not Glass. He’s a big bald guy who plays the guitar really well, go fuck yourself.

Feddd: He was in Almost Famous, you fuck

Sara: So I was standing in line behind him at a 7 11 (my dash key doesn't work). This is NOT a good story, by the way

me: ‪Starting off great

Feddd: ‪Kyle Glass, 7-Eleven

Sara: ‪So anyways, i'm like, omg, that's Kyle Gass and I fucking love Tenacious D so much

me: ‪He was in Almost Famous

Sara: ‪And we're indoors and he's wearing sunglasses Because he's a fucking D lister. And as he was about to leave I felt like I had to say something, so I said, "Hi, I just wanted to tell you my boyfriend and I are huge fans of yours." And to this day, I've thought about why I said "my boyfriend" And I realize it's because if I didn't he would have for sure thought I was trying to fuck him

Feddd: ‪Because you were married at the time

Sara: ‪No I had a boyfriend at the time

me: ‪omg this is by far the most boring story I've ever heard.

Sara: ‪Anyway, he turns to me, holds up the peace sign, and says, "pick up the DVD" and leaves. ‪The DVD of The Pick of Destiny, I think.

me: ‪omg this is the story you choose to share? why would you start this post with Tyler Glass?

Sara: Because he's one of the few I actually spoke to.

me: ‪FEDDD, YOU'RE UP

Feddd: ‪WHO HAVE YOU SEEN EV

Sara: ‪Also I really, really dislike you.

This is what goes for celebrity sightings these days?

me: ‪Who have I seen? Okay.

Feddd: ‪TALKIN THAT SHIT

me: ‪Well, when I was visiting Los Angeles as a child, I was in the backseat of my parents' shit-mobile, and driving behind us was none other than BILL THE COZZINATOR COSBY.

Sara: ‪That's not even true. Don't lie.

me: ‪IT'S FUCKING TRUE. And I happened to be wearing a Temple t-shirt at the time.

Feddd:  ‪I immediately think this is untrue and racist

me: ‪So he's driving behind us and I'm freaking out, so I took off my shirt and tried to show it to The Coz. Kneeling in the backseat, my head essentially jammed into the roof, trying to show him this stupid pit-stained t-shirt.

Feddd: And he said, "My name is Peter Anderson. I am not Bill Cosby."

me: It was really hard to like hold the shirt up and press it against the back windshield, ‘cuz you know they’re at an angle and stuff.

Sara: ‪So did he see it?

Feddd:  ‪DID HE SEE IT?

me: ‪I have no idea. It was a really long time ago. He might've given a thumbs up.

me: I was like 11.

me: Story is 58% true.

Sara: ‪What kind of shit mobile was he driving?

Sara: Who cares. Next!

me: FEDDD, YOU'RE UP.

Coz's Temple Football days. 

Feddd: ‪Hmm

Sara: ‪Off to a good start.

me: ‪C’MON, FEDDD. WHATCHA GOT? JIMMY SMITS?

Feddd: A few days ago I saw Stephen Merchant near my house

me: ‪Any good Jimmy Smits sightings tho?

Sara: ‪OMG I SAW JIMMY SMITS!!!!!!! AND TALKED TO HIM!!!

Feddd: It was the SECOND time I'd seen him tbh

Sara: ‪Okay sorry.

me: ‪WHERE'D YOU SEE HIM, CIRCS?

Feddd: NO YOU GO

Sara: ‪I forgot I saw Jimmy Smits. It was this past May.

me: ‪at 7-Elevs

Feddd: "Jimmy, my boyfriend and I want to fuck you"

Sara: ‪I was out at a bar with a friend, and he was sitting in, like, an armchair. And I recognized him but didn't know from what.

Feddd: ‪Yeah, probably one of the most unmistakable ppl in Hollywood but sure

Sara: ‪And I had had enough to drink that as I was walking by him I was like, "YOU'RE SOMEBODY. WHO ARE YOU?" And my friend behind me was like muttering, "omg please stop please stop"

me: ‪Was this friend Diane Sawyer?

Sara: ‪And Smits sort of smirked and held out his hand and was like, "Jimmy." And I was like "JIMMY WHO" and he laughed and said "who are you?" and I was like "I'm Sara. Who are you?"

Feddd: This is adorable

me: ‪And he was like, "I’m still Jimmy." Okay great story, Circs, let's go back to Feddd.

Sara: ‪And then he finally admitted he was Jimmy Smits and was obviously loving it and then my friend behind me (Kenny) sheepishly shook his hand

me: ‪Kenny Loggins.

Feddd: And that friend was Kenny Rogers

me: ‪STEPHEN MERCH, WHAT WUZ HE WEARING

Feddd: ‪Ooh, this is NOT ON TOPIC but kind of is.

Feddd: One time I was in a clothing store with my gf at the time who was real and existed

me: ‪Kohl's?

Sara: ‪fifty eight percent true

Feddd: And this woman, late 40s, is eyeballing me

me: ‪REALLY late 40's tho

Feddd: I'm like, "uh..." I guess I'm at an age where grown women want to F me at Kohl's

Feddd: Like so late in her 40s that she was prob deep into her 50s

Sara: ‪It's a good place to F, wide aisles

me: ‪no one around

me: possibly closed / out of business

Feddd: And I'm helping my gf try on little buckles and shit …

me: ‪ex-gf

Feddd: and the woman says, loudly, "Hello. Say hi to Mr. Spielberg for me."

Feddd: OH, and she had a cute daughter with her

Sara: ‪Omg anti semitic!

Feddd:  ‪And I said, "What?" She said, "Say hi to Mr. Spielberg." And then hinted that she knew who I was

Sara: ‪Omg who are you??

Feddd: Who did she think I was?

me: ‪She thought you were Edna Spielbs, Stephen Spielberg’s cunt of a wife.

Feddd: I REALIZE THIS IS NOT ON TOPIC AND WE CAN CUT IT

Sara: ‪WHO ARE YOU

me: ‪LET'S HEAR ABOUT STEPHEN MERCH AND THEN END THIS SHIT

Feddd: I always thought it was cuz she thought I was a famous actor

Sara: ‪OMG I DIDN'T EVEN GET TO PAUL MCCARTS

Feddd: ‪WHAT?

Sara: ‪Wait you don't even know who she thought you were?

Feddd: ‪Yeah

Sara: ‪Ugh

Feddd: I mean, no

Sara: ‪Now I really want to figure it out

me: ‪Why do I care so much about what Stephen Merch was wearing?

Feddd: ‪ANYWAY I saw Stephen Merch once at a bowling alley and was disappointed cuz he actually looked really cool and was with two grade-A smoketanks

me: ‪Did you set that place on fire be honest

Sara left the group chat

Feddd left the group chat

me: See ya guys.






Not only are the Golden Glizzies on this Sunday, but so is the Bach Behind the Scenes, Downton Abbers and the Girls season premiere! What are you gonna watch? Let me know in the comments sectsh, or don't, honestly who cares, just check out this picture of women boxing on the roof, circa the 1930s.

10 comments:

  1. Holy shit, this was unbearably painful to try to read (honestly, I got through 28% of it then scrolled down here, where clearly no one else thought this hot garbage was worth posting on, either...). You should all be tremendously ashamed.*

    *hit me up if you ever wanna hear about the time I flew from DFW to LAX and chatted up Will Ferrell. After all, I WORK ON A FUCKING MOVIE STUDIO LOT!!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. THANK YOU FOR COMMENTING AND GETTING THE BALL ROLLING BUT I WILL NEVER, EVER, EVER HAVE YOU ON THIS WEBSITE. THX FOR READING THO. STILL NEVER.

      Delete
    2. MGG, we're gonna try and make it easier for you to read next time. FOR YOU. IT'S ALL FOR YOU. Working out the kinks here. Trying to please you people. Note this is not my blog.

      Delete
  2. I took a flight three rows behind Tom Berenger last year. I told my wife and she was like, "Who's tom Berenger? Does he make the wine my mom drinks?" And then I showed her a picture and she still had no idea.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Apparently she's not a big AFHV fan.

      Delete
  3. I know this guy. Went to my high school. Saw him over Christmas. Nice dude.

    http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0098013/?ref_=fn_al_nm_1

    ReplyDelete
  4. You guys think LA is the only place to spot celebs? I once saw Kate Gosselin in a Sheetz bathroom in Dillsburg, PA! I mean, I'm mostly sure it was her. I didn't want to be that creepy person talking to strangers in the gas station bathroom so I didn't say anything.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yo Sheetz got some nice bathrooms

      Delete
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